The Circle of Life

This post by Pioneer Woman was beautiful. It brought back so many memories of the two grandmothers and one great-grandmother that I have had in my life. Especially now that I am going to be a grandmother myself, it makes me really want to be deliberate about the kind of grandmother I want to be and the memories I want to make with my grandchildren. This post made me think about that. It is powerful.

I have had special relationships with all three of them, yet they were all very different women and taught me different things.

Mamaw Dunn

The homemaker and cook in me comes from my Mamaw Dunn. She always had a beautiful home and enjoyed taking care of it. She loved to cook and always tried new recipes when we came to visit. She was never to busy to let me or my cousins help prepare meals. I especially loved her turkey and dressing, coke floats, and scrambled eggs. I see her kitchen in my mind just like I was in it yesterday. Every detail, from her recipe box and metal canisters that always sat on the counter to the aluminum cups and the paper bag that she used to dry and reuse paper towels! She was a gracious hostess and I remember years of bridge club luncheons at her house. I learned how to set a table, how to cut a steak and table manners in general from her.

She was also a devoted wife. I only aspire to be the wife that she was. Taking care of my grandfather was always the priority in her life. As I grew older I enjoyed watching the dynamics of their relationship. They shared so much playfulness. My grandfather would tease her constantly and it amused her so. He could make her laugh like no one else. They brought so much joy to each other's lives.

Thank you Mamaw for the part of me that is you. I miss you so.

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Mama Ese

The part of me that is a decorator and seamstress, I owe to Mama Ese. I am so lucky that she just lives down the street so I can still ask her advice when I need it! She has lived many places in her life, but I was always able to spend time in the summer with her. We would have projects each year. One year I would learn to sew a pair of shorts and the next I would learn to knit. The needlecraft that stuck for me though was counted crossstitch. I have spent hours and hours of my life enjoying this hobby and I owe it to Mama Ese.

In the many homes that she has had, she was constantly changing things up. Whether it was hanging literally hundreds of pictures on her walls or finding just the right spot for the chest she picked up from the neighbors garbage, she was always decorating her home. Probably the only person not happy with this particular inherited trait of mine is David, because the gene I did not get was the one that involves shopping in thrift stores!

Another quality of Mama Ese that I hope to embody is her devotion to family. Even when I was very young I can remember seeing her help out those members of our family that were down on their luck. She would send them a little money each month or clothes that she had picked up at the Goodwill store. Each act in and of itself may not have been significant, but cumulatively they were life-changing. I am sure it meant a lot to the family she helped. But I know it made a lasting impression on this little girl who was watching.

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Mayme

I am not sure that I have words to describe the relationship I shared with my great-grandmother Mayme. There was a closeness, a bond and a connection I cannot explain. I can't attribute it to our similarities, because I don't know what they are. I only know that the memories I have with her are some of my most precious. One of the earliest memories I have is being a very small child and having her put me to bed at night. She would lie down beside me and sing "Go Tell Aunt Rhody" . I slept on a small bed in the dining room, under a quilt, with the air conditioner in the window blowing on me. It was the BEST sleep ever!

Everytime we moved when I was young she would come and stay to help us get settled. If my brother or I had the mumps or the chicken pox, she would come and take care of us.

She was so precious to me. I grew up always hearing her say she would not live to see me graduate high school. Yet she was there. Then she said she would not live to see me get married. And she was there. When I was pregnant with Sarah, she was not well, but she was so worried about me. As it was time for me to give birth, she entered the hospital. We talked on the phone a few times and she was still worried about me. Then I went to the hospital myself and was preoccupied for a few days giving birth. On my first day home with my first baby, my dad had to share the news that Mayme had passed away. She lived long enough to know that I was okay and her great-great-granddaughter was okay. She asked someone to go to the gift shop to buy us a gift and then she was gone. I could not even travel to her funeral. There was no closure for me and I was heartbroken.

A few nights later I was asleep in my bed alone (David was at work). Sarah was in the bassinet next to me. I awoke to see Mayme standing over the bassinet looking at my baby. A feeling of such peace and calm came over me. She looked at the baby, looked at me, smiled and then she was gone. I can see it as clearly today as I did 26 years ago. Was she really there? Was it a dream? My imagination? Too much pain medicine? The Circle of Life? Whatever it was, to me it was evidence of a love (or is it Love) that transends this world.

So as she always used to say to me- Mayme, I love you the most.

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So I guess the purpose of this post is that I want to be intentional about the kind of grandmother I am and the kind of memories I make with my grandchildren. All of my grandmothers lived in other states while I was growing up. A trip to grandmother's house was so thrilling. You got to pack a suitcase and travel for hours. Oh, the excitement as we got closer and closer to that Osceola water tower. You had to fit a lot of fun into a week or two. At least for now, for this grandchild, I will live just around the corner. Will that make for a different kind of relationship, a more daily relationship? I intend to make sure it is just as thrilling to go to this Grammy's house!

Sofia, Bella and I. I'm a natural, don't you think??